Cold Spaghetti

“It always pays to be prepared,” Button says.

“Yes sirree, indeed,” Fulbert replies.

“Do you think we need our galoshes, Fulbert dear?” Button asks.

“No, I want everyone to admire my cute ankles,” Fulbert answers.

(photos by Paul)

Sometime in the not so distant future, Kate is going to come fussing to me to report that her brother held her down and farted on her nose AGAIN with Will on her heals complaining OH NO she was fighting to get that last red flat 8 bump lego piece out of his pocket and it was HER fault and then Kate shouts but you LAUGHED and FARTED and he says OH YEAH, WELL MY FARTS SMELL BETTER THAN YOUR FEET and she…

… and I’ll look at them both dumbfounded and say, “who ARE you people?  Do you see this picture?  See these sweet angelic children cuddling in bed?  These, THESE are my children.”

Top Chef was at the Farmer’s Market today.  It’s spring break for the kids, so they were there, too… which is why Paul and I weren’t able to stick around for the show and tasting.

I met Paul and the kids there (I came late from French class), where Paul filled me in that there was to be strictly no video recording and that Radhika had been in a scooter accident yesterday and given herself terrible black eyes.  She told the crowd “always wear a helmet,” which, as a ‘learn from me example’ means she must have been really lucky.

In addition to the chefs, there were games.

But, at least while we were there, it was all about the food.  I loved the big mirror reflecting the cooking area.

Richard was talking about halibut.  That’s all I remember.

These blender bikes were pretty cool, too.

We brought home broccoli…

Carrots… (notice his face? I couldn’t get him to smile, until I asked him to talk about toilets…)

…and now he’s smiling.

And Cauliflower.

Here’s the question: what would you make??  All veggies together?  Roasted Cauliflower?  Broccoli cheese soup?  A casserole?

Ideas and suggestions welcome!!

We were in the neighborhood, so we stopped by Emmy’s yesterday afternoon.  Emmy was exhausted, as was I, but we both seemed a little recovered by company and the sight of each other’s kids.  We scheduled for an late afternoon rendezvous back at her place.

Joined by friend Georgia and three large frozen adult beverages, we took over their neighborhood.  Six kids (Emmy’s three, my two and Georgia’s one) to three Mamas, supported by slow-sips and conversation.  They picked kumquats (my kids thought they were funny-tasting tomatoes, aye), swung on tree swings, and played in wooden forts.  No one was stung by a caterpillar or eaten by red ants.

By the time we came up for air, it was 6:30.  Monday is movie night, right?

Monday Movie was Madagascar.

It came with pizza.

It also comes with plenty of MOVE IT MOVE IT.

Which meant that Will could put his moves to use.

It was exactly what I needed — maybe what we all needed?  Good friends, cold drinks, quality conversation, fun time with the kids, and mostly… a reminder to chill.

Somehow, it doesn’t seem like enough, but THANK YOU.  THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU.

We don’t want to leave New Orleans.

But we’re preparing to do so.

It’s been several stressful months here after Paul’s contract evaporated a few months earlier than expected.  He’s got a wonderful start-up in the works, but it’s a start-up… it’s not a job.  And it’s not close to being finished.  Our expenses, which are almost completely made up of three things (house, kids’ school, health insurance), have eaten through our savings… again.  This has happened to us before.  Job lay-offs have put us within 2-3 months of losing it all at least twice since getting married.  But we have always managed to work it out.

And we’re trying to work it out.  We should be able to work it out.

But here’s the rub: while it’s hopeful that Paul will have 8 more weeks of billable work coming soon, after that…?  After that, the options are very limited.  There is no high tech in New Orleans.  My assorted jobs will not carry us — living in a high-expense city means that Paul must work.  What if there is nothing after this 8 weeks?  Then what?  The stress of that question alone is a pretty tremendous weight.

We know we have to start preparing, just in case.  Which means we’re looking around thinking about what we have to do to get the house ready for sale, or possibly (hopefully?) lease.  We’ve canceled the extras.  We’re selling things (anyone want Impacto Zero?  Or a double stroller?  For that matter, email me if you want our house!)  We’re trying to see if Will can attend First Grade at an Immersion Charter School (since he’s 62nd on the wait list for Kindergarten), in the event we can work it out to be here in the fall.  Maybe I can try to beg Kate into the one that takes 3 year olds?

We’re debating.

Overseas….?  Well, I’d need to find work.  It would be cheaper to live.  The kids would still have immersion in a second language.  Paul could work on the start-up full-time and we’d live off my salary.  I could only do it for a year or so because then I’d have to get back to finishing my dissertation, which I would not be able to do while holding a full-time job.

Move to the NOLA suburbs…?   We’d be staying in the States and could keep the kids in an Immersion school.  Paul would still have to work somewhere, and we wouldn’t need as big of a salary… but he wouldn’t be challenged.  We’re not really suburb people, but it wouldn’t be as bad here as other places.

Move somewhere for a job for Paul…?  This one scares us the most.  He could easily get a job in the DC area, but the thought of us moving up there hits like a death sentence.

Move somewhere else for a job for either of us…?  The irony is that Louisiana is the best place for me — it’s the least healthy place in the United States and ground zero for all my skills and interests.  But there is no work here (part of the reason our health outcomes are 50/50 across the board.)  Where else could we go?

It feels so odd for both of us to have so much promise, talent, and skill… and to have to struggle to put it in the place we want most to give it.

The bottom line is that like so many others we are filled with uncertainty.  I force myself to ignore it, we’ve done it before and I can’t destroy myself dwelling on one more thing.  (I spend enough time worrying about house fires and driving into a lake.)  The high cost of living here?  It’s wearing us down, frankly.  Paul’s digestive system sounds like an espresso machine and my eyes look like I’ve been boxing without a mask.  How long until we break?  Do we keep trying to work it out, or do we bail?  And if we bail, we run out of here and to….?

We just don’t know.

Too much candy on Easter?  Try the BUNNY SALAD…

Step 1: Assemble ingredients.  Pears, lettuce/spinach leaves, carrots, strawberries, cottage cheese, peppercorns.  A plate for your garden, peeling tool, and cutting board are also useful.  Note that the actual recipe calls for fully-sized carrots and cloves, which will screw you up later, so be prepared to roll with it.

Household bunnies are optional.  Note that if you take one to the store, there will be a lot of pointing and giggling.

Step 2: Contemplate safety of child’s fingers, then say, “F* it” (to yourself, please) and let them go to town with the peeler.  Consider counting fingers before he starts, just in case.

Step 3: Use a knife to cut peeled pear in half.  Keep the stem on the end for a nose, if you like.  Use the peppercorns and carrots as eyes and ears.

Damn.  The string carrots won’t work.  Substitute pear peel.

Damn.  Pear peel won’t stick.  Neither will peppercorns.  Realize you screwed up.

Get creative.  Dig some holes for the eyes.  And ears.

Step 4: Get smart.  Use toothpicks.  Let the kid cut the toothpicks before insertion, he’ll love it.

Pat yourself on the back for being such a Super Mom.

Step 5: Notch that Super Mom status up a few bars by letting the 5 year old use the KNIFE.  The emergency room won’t judge you, you creative Mom, you!

Step 6: Add strawberries and carrots to the lettuce patch.  You’ve got bunnies in the garden!

(Note: if you haven’t already realized that you need two bunnies for your two children, hurry and make a second.  Substitute whatever necessary to make it work.)

Step 7: Don’t forget to use the cottage cheese to make fluffy bunny tails!

Step 8: Have your kids pose with their salads so you can send them to Mothering and Parenting websites and magazines.  You need to document your awesomeness.

Step 9: Realize that your kids may begin to get that the salad is a ploy to distract from eating Easter candy.  Be prepared to talk up the awesomeness of the salad!

Step 10: Reward children who eat bunny salad with Easter candy.  As if it would end any other way.

I finished an abstract today, ahead of schedule, thus completing one of my recently self-assigned dissertation milestones.  It was an incredible achievement on my part, right up there with my self-inflicted embargo of the Twilight series (I may not read until I’ve finished a draft).  My work ethic — it boggles the mind.

All the work work work please don’t talk to me I’m writing work work laundry laundry make dinner work has made it very difficult to procrastinate, which means that I was unable to plan for a last-minute trip out of town.  We were close to picking up and heading out to a tax-deductible, in-support-of-the-company weekend trip to Houston to go to the Ikea (356 miles away) to binge on cheap Scandavian furniture for the office.  When Paul found out that they had BOTH a supervised children’s play area AND cooked ham with mashed potatoes for $6.99, he was ready to take off this afternoon.  Unfortunately, responsibility found out and came knocking and finger-wagging.  Sure, it’d be NICE to have books up off the floor and all, but the next year’s school fees and summer camp deposits are BOTH due at the end of the month.  And the kids need shoes.

In the spirit of looking for creative ways to pay tuition… I’m I too old to sell my unused lady eggs?  They are very effective.

My lovely Aunt Deb, a photographer, traveler, hard-working, dedicated, all-round sort of lady to admire, came and visited for the past 4 days and we’ve been basking in the glow of it. Besides the fun excuses it gives us to blow off working and go out to yummy lunches, we have had an extra adult in the house to help with kid wrangling. The bonus is that this adult cooks, cleans, and grocery shops without so much as a peep from us– she just sees that something needs to be done and does it! It’s like having a fairy godmother around doing all the things you just can’t bare to think about.

Plus, she’s fun to take pictures with.

The kids adored her and we know this because they actually smile when she pulls out her camera. A very different reaction from what I get.

Between adventures in photography and culinary indulgences, I’ve managed to finish my Schweitzer Poster for tomorrow’s Celebration in Service, AND completed my final report (which isn’t due until May 1st, how’s that for accomplishment?!)

(Please don’t ask how much I’ve written in my dissertation. It may make me cry.)

(Insert baby duck chaser as mood lifter.)

I am trying to finish an abstract in the next few days for conference submission. It was a goal I set a few months ago and after Alejna‘s brilliant balancing act of abstract writing and cross-country travel, I want to be her when I grow up so I’m thinking this is a good start. That’s SORT OF writing for my dissertation, so maybe that means I’m not totally off schedule. 

(Insert inspirational rainbow.)

Here’s where I could use some insight:

This weekend starts Will and Kate’s spring break.  Paul and I have to be back for work mid-week, giving us 4 days open for Quality Family Time.  4 days of it.  Since the kids are out of school, we’ve got them no matter what, so shouldn’t we use the time as best as we can?  (If we stay, no matter what, we’ll work through those days.)  We could leave as early as Friday.

Should we have a family siesta out of town? And, if so, are there suggestions on fun and exciting things to do within 5 hours of New Orleans?

—

OH. And we’re working on those Just Posts…. due out on the 10th this month! Because we’re (ahem) nostalgic. 4-1-1 available here.

Kate’s room, as seen last night while the kids were in the tub.  It is now officially Kate’s room.

We moved in furniture from our room and gathered it on one wall. Without the huge bed in the room, it feels cavernous.

The house is feeling strange. Posh, even.   There are no boxes piled in the kids’ “play” area.  Toys are displayed in places where kids can reach them and use them.  Children have separate areas.  There are places for imaginative play.  We are not stepping over drying pieces of wood trim.  Unprotected tools, wires, and other dangerous equipment are limited to a few places.

The canopy was one of Kate’s Christmas presents.  It has flowers and butterflies to decorate and hang at the top… I’ll tackle doing that with her one afternoon when I can pack up my crazies tight in a box and be okay with her going wild on those perfect little flowers…

We never painted Kate’s closet doors.  This is because we keep going back and forth on whether or not we’re going to put my Great-Grandmother’s vanity beside the closet — which would prevent the doors from opening.  If we did this, we were going to hang curtains over the door openings.  I actually have had the curtains since before Kate was born… but we can’t decide whether to actually move the vanity.

Sometimes, I seem to favor discussing the possibilities more than actually doing them. Also, I really like to move furniture around.

Now the thought is that we’re going to move the bookshelf into Will’s room and put the mirror up on the wall for Kate, with hooks along side to hang her hats and masks for dress up.

These wood pieces are from Iquitos.  A butterfly and 2 parrots are missing — they were missing anchors on their backs for hanging.  Another trip to the hardware store and they’ll join the bunch.

I finished this painting the night before Will was born… I never even signed my name!  Kate calls it “Mommy,” which I love.  The angels and moon/stars are Nancy Thomas, compliments of my Mother’s wonderful taste in fun, lively art.  (She worked for Nancy in her studio/store in Yorktown when I was in college.)

Kate has been enthralled with each and every part of the room… I was surprised she stopped for a second to smile at the camera!

The art on the door is from Will — maybe it’s time for Kate to hang up some door art?

I’m trying to think of other ways to display their art around the house… cords hanging on the walls to display pieces like a laundry line?  Other ideas?  It seems like they bring home volumes of paper from school and it just piles up in the kitchen.  With all the space in their rooms, I feel like it should have a place, too, where the kids can be proud of what they have done.  What do other parents do?