On this birthday

After letting me sleep in, Paul greeted me with a tidbit from this morning’s NPR show, Wait Wait Don’t Tell Me. The show deals with quirky current events and includes a game where a contestant listens to three different stories linked by a common theme and chooses which of the three is the one that is true (the other two being made-up stories).

This morning, the stories were on the subject of patents taken out for various devices related to birth (hence why Paul thought it appropriate, it being my birthday and all). Guest panelist Paula Poundstone’s contribution to the three stories of “Unlikely Patents,” was the following paraphrased description of a possible patent:

A machine which uses centripetal force on a birthing mother by spinning her around and around to lessen how hard the mother has to push when delivering a baby.

Yikes.

Sorry, folks, someone holds the patent to that yet unmade device. I shudder to think what horrors the made-up stories held.

On that note: thanks, Mom.