Cold Spaghetti

Highlights of our year.

Will. He began the year crawling in onesies and ended the year walking in Big Boy clothes. We find new ways to be proud everyday while we learn that parenting is truly a difficult and challenging adventure full of fear, heartache, love, and trust.

Family. We watched both of our syblings marry wonderful people. I had the pleasure of performing my brother and sister-in-law’s wedding ceremony. We (unexpectedly) spent many weeks of time with family in the fall.

Friends. We visited and were visited by many. Wyatt and Eli for Mardi Gras. Randy and Katherine, Robin and Dave, Dave and Shelley, Paul during a visit to Northern Virginia. Niki, who judged a dance competition in New Orleans last winter. Millard, Violet, Scott, Bethany, Evie, Adam and Jodi and other Michigan friends in Ann Arbor. Both families during the summer weddings. Gwen, Mario, and Gwen’s Dad in St. Simon’s in the fall. Paul’s family in Duck. My girlfriends Christie, David, Steph and Mike in NC. We had the joy of exposing Will to so many people that we care about and hope that he can group up learning from as we have.

Health. I struggled with bacterial pneumonia and signed my first AMA release from medical care. I became pregnant a second time with little trying.

Home. We learned what it means to miss New Orleans. We watched the city we live in drown and felt our hearts ache for the continued ignorance and arrogance of those around us. We can better understand the nature of disaster, having lived for days with questions of whether we would have a place to return home. Luck is something we do not take for granted. Home is something that we look to for people, not things.

Work. Paul continues to enrich our lives with a flexible job that gives him pleasure and allows us to be an incredibly family. I managed to continue to work through the disaster, sought out mentorship, took comprehensive exams, passed them, and became a candidate for a doctoral degree. We somehow have figured out how to both have fulfilling and important careers without long commutes or inflexible demands that give us the ability to spend time each day as a family.

During our drive from New Orleans to Mobile tonight, we talked about the last year and the ones ahead. We talked out some financial concerns, tried to consider other places we could see ourselves living, the kind of lifestyle we wanted, places and things of importance. We are nervous about the tremendousness of the house project we want to take on in the early spring. We are excited about the birth of a second child. We still can’t believe that we leave for Lima in only 3 more days. In short, we are humbled by the year ahead of us and cannot wait to face it together.

Tomorrow we head back to The Big Easy to wrap up the final projects on the house before we take off. Remember the door? Those days of stripping and staining in the innocence of life before Katrina? Before we left for Mobile for the holiday, Paul managed to hang the one door that was actually finished. We think it turned out pretty nifty.

The day after Christmas, we took in the Christmas lights display at Bellingrath Gardens. The display covers several acres of beautiful gardens which turn into a walking tour through holiday lights and music. It was very beautiful! Will stayed alert through the tour and did a great job of narrating (“Santa Claus” “train” “flower” et cetera.)

All of us (minus Skip, our photographer) at the start of the light display.

Lights down the hillside and over a running stream and lakebed.

Flowers were also blooming along various parts of the gardens. Here, the wading pool is lit up with mist rising from the water. It was very beautiful!

Walking through an open part of the gardens.

Emily and Skip in the greenhouses. They had a wonderful collection of blooming orchids!

More Bellingrath!

The day after Christmas, Paul and I took Emily and Skip geocaching! We enjoyed a gorgeous almost 70-degree day and sought out 3 caches (two with hints and information — one with only the GPS that we later discovered had not been found by anyone in a few months.) We had a great time and feel assured that the addiction is spreading!

Can you find the cache?
Skip at his first find!
Skip opens up the cache!

The recap:
– Will and I arrived in Mobile the weekend before to allow Paul “quiet time” at home (aka: unlimited evening hours for using power tools)
– I daytripped to New Orleans on Wednesday, packed up, cleaned out closets, had a great lunch at local favorite Frankie and Johnnie’s with Paul, and the two of us returned to NOLA Wednesday night.
– Thursday was our all day trip to Pensacola for our prenatal visit. (20 weeks, 6 days; total weight gain ~12 pounds; BP 104/58; Baby’s HR: ~150) Ultrasound looked good and it’s a girl!
– Enjoyed wonderful Christmas Eve dinner at Felix’s Fish Camp on Mobile Bay. Skip and Emily arrived late Saturday night.
– We managed to keep Will away from presents (a miracle) until well into the morning. We started presents after a wonderful mid-morning brunch, opened for about an hour or so, took a break for “Will’s” nap, and then opened the last bits in the late afternoon. Will provided assistance with all unwrapping — hence we still are guessing the intended “from” and “to” on many of the gifts. Paul made veggie pot pie for dinner!
– Granna and PapPap gave Will a Geotrax train set. After seeing PapPap’s excitement over it, we now know what to get PapPap for Christmas next year. All of the Boys have taken turns routing the track in different patterns. This has been a necessary task as Will promptly destroys the track after watching the train take a few loops.
– Paul and I enjoyed many generous presents to help us for our upcoming trip. Travel books, novels by Peruvian authors, and financial contributions! We hope that these will help us enjoy some side trips outside of Lima.
– Paul and Skip opened power tools (Paul: framing nail gun, 8′ step ladder, driver set, level; Skip: miter saw, tool belt). Emily and I opened kitchen tools (Emily: knife set; Me: Natucket Basket mugs)
– The cats enjoyed the lack of presents and quickly retook their chosen sleep positions nestled in the skirt around the tree.
– Pictures are below!Will plays Christmas morning.

Christmas brunch!
Christmas morning — before the “unbridled avarice” of opening presents! (Extra points, if, like our family, you’ve seen “A Christmas Story” so many times that you can quote any line in the film and instantly recognize the reference!)
Will “helps” Aunt Emily open up a present.

Will opens his very special gift from PapPap… his own kid-size 9-iron.
Uncle Skip, PapPap and Will play with the Geotrax train, Christmas afternoon.
Will opens his tiger flashlight — the light is in his mouth and it roars when you open it!
Paul opens his framing nail gun. (Skip took this picture — that is why I actually am in it!)
Will and Uncle Skip run the train (the control is in Will’s hand.)

Mail in New Orleans:
— For those who have sent stuff only to have it returned or lost, I finally deciphered the code. Only first class mail gets through. All media mail, flyers, periodicals, and other are returned to sender. If you’d like us to receive something that isn’t first class mail, send it to my parents’ house in Mobile (email me for the address).

Comps:
— Today marks three weeks post-comps. Still no word. I’ve been in contact with everyone. My only clue was from Penny last week “some responses in and good” but besides that cryptic insight, I know nothing. Carl emailed last night to say that “tomorrow is the day” but it is quickly approaching 4pm with no news. A few more days and I may be getting an ulcer for Christmas.

Teeth:
— I forgot how hard it is to have really clean teeth when pregnant. Not sure if this experience is common, but brushing and flossing is challenging… my gag reflex is so super sensitive that it takes a long time to get a clean mouth. I’m brushing or gargling a hundred times a day and still don’t quite feel fresh. What is up with that?

Myself, my mother, my grandmother, and my great-grandmother are all first born girls. When I was pregnant with Will, I felt confident that I would be continuing in this tradition. I truly believed that fate would bring me a girl. When we had a 20-week ultrasound, I made grand claims that there would be “no stem on the apple” visible in the fuzzy pictures. We learned two things that day: that I was wrong and that Will was probably not going to need a sports car.

That day I learned that the knowledge of a baby’s sex could be an experience in humor and humility. As a result, in this pregnancy, I have been hesitant to claim authoritative knowledge on the baby’s sex. With the first pregnancy, Paul and I had a firm choice in boy’s names (William, obviously) but not so firm on girl’s names. This time, we are firm on girl’s names (Katherine “Kate”) but not so firm on boy’s names (Jackson “Jack” and Charles “Charlie” are my top picks, neither one liked much by Paul, who has not had any favorites thus far.) So I have been going on the belief that because we actually have a firm name picked for a girl, it therefore had to be a girl.

Subconsciously, I’ve been thinking, feeling, and wanting a girl. A boy and a girl, one of each, “the complete set” as Paul calls it. Without intending to, I have been fixating on this baby being a girl. I slip up and call the baby “she”. I’ve been checking out girl’s crib linens (Will’s linens are blue cars, trucks, and airplanes). I’ve been planning out how to do a fun gender-neutral bedroom (the kids will share a room) that has accents of both boy and girl colors. This has all been happening in secret. I have been afraid that sharing my secret thoughts would jinx me good. I know that Murphy’s Law is out there and I have experienced its humbling poignancy.

So today was a big day. It turns out Murphy let me slide.

*It’s a girl!*

I know it looks bad. There were those claims made in the 3rd grade. I even planned the heist with a cooler on the scene. But it didn’t happen then, and I promise, it didn’t happen now. That little penguin is hiding out at someone else’s house.