{ Monthly Archives }
February 2005
Struggling Mommy
I knew it would come, everyone says it does. I am missing my baby. It is incredibly difficult to work on a PhD while being a parent of a young child. I tend to shrug off when people comment on how impressive it is that I am managing both… I attribute it to a strong, supportive spouse and a great kid and leave it at that. But really, it is so much more.
I am a jealous that Paul gets every afternoon with Will — they play in the park, go for walks, and run errands. It becomes time for me to work or have class, so it is in theory a gift of time for me. I am so lucky that Paul is able to be with him, as opposed to a sitter that we don’t have the budget for. But it makes me keenly aware of what I am missing.
I do not want to stop what I am doing, but I do wish I could slow it down. As with any profession, the academy does not take consideration of children. If anything, it forces parents (particularly women) to work even harder to prove that they can do it. I am not saying Tulane necessarily applies this pressure, but the overall feel of any academic environment certainly has these overtones. One of my professors told me today that she actually finished her disseration before her cohort — by more than a year — and she attributed this to her having to be so scheduled because of being a parent and needing to juggle both. She felt that my efforts were much in the same light. Of course, I want to finish slower, not faster — and have more time to be both a Mom and a doctoral student at the same time — so I’m not sure how what I want to do fits in with what is expected of me to do.
The bottom line is: I absolutely understand why parents (ie: Mothers) “chose” to stay home. THERE IS NO CHOICE. The mechanisms to allow us to have both really aren’t there.
Static Electricity
Will loves our neighborhood park and especially loves the slides. Sliding on his belly, he flies down the slides so quickly that he often lands on all fours on the asphalt at the bottom. He LOVES it.
We’ve recently lost the camera lens cap, so we haven’t been taking the camera to the park. What a pity! Paul said that today on the slide, Will’s hair caught the static electricity from the slide and caused his super-baby fine red hair to stand on end, much to the amusement to Paul and the other parents and kids in the park. THAT would have been a great photographic moment!
Will’s guide to eating lunch
1. Decide what food preference is for the day. While anything is game, current preferences should definitely be different than yesterday’s.
2. Choose one food (for example, peas). Put as many as you can in your mouth, chewing steadily, but don’t swallow. Watch Mommy and Daddy get very excited and put more in front of you. Continue to fill your mouth.
3. If something else more interesting should be placed on your high chair while you are filling your mouth, feel free to spit out what you are chewing and fill your mouth with the other food.
4. Just as they are convinced you are eating, stick out your tongue and allow all your chewed food to fall into your lap. For the smaller pieces that don’t fall out, make raspberries with your lips to spray them across the room.
5. Watch as Mommy and Daddy put another food in front of you, for example bananas. Eat two pieces of banana. Then take the third and press it on your head. Be sure to smear it through your hair. Then lick the rest of the smashed banana off your hand. Try this method on your plate. For the rest of the meal, everything should be smashed.
6. Open your mouth as Mommy gives you pieces of peach. Make her happy by eating a few pieces. When she puts one in front of you, be sure to smear the juice all over your highchair with your hand. Remember to smash!
7. Try to stand up in the high chair. Clearing your highchair of all food will help you. Clear it well, getting all remaining pieces of food on the floor. Extra points if you can hit a cat.
8. Make grand gestures to show that you want exactly what Mommy and Daddy are eating. Then push it away with gusto when they attempt to share. Extra points if you can get them to give you their food, and then throw it on the floor.
9. Drink some of your milk. Shake it up until the flow regulator falls out of the top. Then pour milk from the spout on to your high chair. Try to soak your sleeves with milk. Then toss your milk at the cats.
10. Wait for Daddy to share his pudding with you. Eat up all of this neatly, it’s the good stuff.
Photos from Weekend!
Here are our photos from the weekend, playing with Will and hanging out with Niki!
Weekend!
Niki Wolf was in town judging a dance competition this weekend and was able to spend Saturday and Sunday evenings with us! I made my Mom’s famous ziti for Saturday dinner and then we went into the Quarter to the Jackson Square Cafe du Monde for beignets and hot chickory coffee. Sunday, we played with Will during the afternoon rain, then walked to the local Taqueria for dinner (where our super nanny, Margarita, works in the afternoon) and then played with Will some more! Niki and I bonded over the latest episode of “Desperate Housewives” before driving her back to her hotel. We had a GREAT visit and hope to see her and Jeff in New York sometime soon!!
